This blog features Ernest Hemingway’s story “Hills Like White Elephants” which is about the tension between a man and a woman while they are talking over drinks. The man wants the woman to have an operation that the woman is hesitant about but will do it anyway in order to please the man. Stated below is my argument about whether or not she stays with the man. In addition, I have included my own story about a time where I decided to get out of a toxic friendship.
After reading the story “Hills Like White Elephants,” I think the woman most likely ends up staying with the man even though she should leave the relationship. My argument is that she is willing to do anything for the man, even if she does not want the operation or it is too dangerous. The woman mentions that she does not care about herself and that she will do anything to make the relationship better. The man seems to be very manipulative by saying that she can make her own choice, but he also mentions how their relationship will go back to the way it was if she has this operation. He does not want to seem controlling, so instead, he emphasizes that having the operation will be more beneficial. The man knows that the woman will do anything for him and continues to repeat how their love will grow after the procedure. When the woman does not want the man to talk anymore, she most likely realizes how toxic her relationship is. However, while the man was taking their bags to the train platform, she probably told herself that she wanted to be in a relationship with the man and did not want to leave him. At the end, she said, “I feel fine. There nothing wrong with me. I feel fine (Ernest Hemingway).” This shows that she completely ignored the argument and her feelings, in order to stay with the man. For this reason, I think she still stays with the man despite her better judgment. The summer before my freshman year of high school, I had a very big and life-changing surgery where I had to have my entire femur bone removed. It was replaced by a metal rod and afterward, I was on crutches for a long time. I was very nervous going into high school since I could not properly walk. However, I was going into the year with great friends from my high school, particularly my friend Elissa. We had become best friends during eighth grade and we did everything together. When I had my surgery, she was such a big help in getting me out of the house or giving me my own personal spa day. It was one of the best summers I had because she made me forget all about the pain in my leg. The first day of high school rolled around and I thought everything was going to be great because Elissa and I had all the same classes together. However, the day ended in tears. Since I was still on crutches, I needed her help carrying my books and we had to leave five minutes early from each class because I walked slower. Throughout the day, she became more and more distant. She was not talking to me and she left the classroom without waiting for me. The last couple of periods, I ended up having to carry my books myself and I was ten minutes late to class. When I got home, I cried to my mom because of how awful the day was. By the end of the school week, I knew things were very different between me and Elissa. I eventually confronted her about it. Most of the argument was over text message. “Hey, so it’s been really hard for me to carry my books from class to class and I was wondering if you could help me. I know it’s hard to carry all those books, but I could take a few to make it easier?” “Listen, Molly. This is high school now. It’s different than grade school. I can’t keep carrying your books and leaving class five minutes early. I’ll get behind and it’s not an easy thing to do. Plus, I need to make other friends.” Now, I was no longer sad. I was raging with fury. I texted, “You think it’s easy for me? Going to a new school, not being able to walk? Having to carry three textbooks, while being on crutches? Not knowing anyone else? I come home from school every day crying because so far I really hate high school and you’re not making it any better!” “I should not be the only one responsible for helping you throughout the day. It’s stressful! Make other friends,” she typed. “I will, but until I do, I need help. You’re being really selfish!” It was like an all-out war over text and we said a lot of awful things. In the end, we apologized to each other but nothing was the same after that. Not wanting to eat alone, I sat with her group of friends at lunch, but I would not say a word. I would ask random people if they could help me carry my books in between classes. Seeing Elissa in class having fun with other friends, made me so jealous. One day, right around homecoming, I realized we could not salvage the friendship and I had to move on. After that, I never spoke a word to her again. At first, I regretted not trying harder to keep the friendship. We had so many amazing memories together and I did not think I could have another friendship like that. However, after joining some clubs and branching out in my classes, I made the best friends I could ever ask for. I found people who had similar interests with me. We started hanging out on weekends and having sleepovers. Today, they are still my best friends and we talk often, despite being in college. Even though I was miserable at the time, I believe that things worked out for the better when I decided I did not want to be friends with Elissa anymore. I think if we held on to the toxic friendship we had, I never would have met my best friends.
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This blog discusses the podcast “What You Don't Know” by Lulu Wang and my argument about her story involving a time when she told the biggest lie of her life to her grandmother. In addition, I have provided below a personal narrative about a situation in my life where I almost told someone a difficult truth but decided to lie instead.
In the story, Wang’s grandmother, who is called Nainai, is diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and is only given three months to live. However, Nainai’s sister, called Little Nainai, tells everyone in the family that Wang’s grandmother can never find out that she only has a short time left to live. Her reasoning was that Nainai will be too upset and her condition will become worse. Wang thinks this idea is completely absurd and that she must tell her grandmother the truth. However, her parents forbid her and say that she cannot go to China to see Nainai one last time if she gives it away. Everyone suppresses their overwhelming feeling of grief and put on a happy face for Nainai. Because no one told her about her cancer, she ended up living for another three happy years and in her 2015 appointment, her condition was still the same. After listening to Lulu Wang’s story “What You Don’t Know,” I found myself baffled throughout the tale for many different reasons. When Wang said that her family decided not to tell her Nainai that she was ill, I immediately thought this was terrible, and almost immoral, plan. I thought that Nainai definitely deserved to know, without a doubt in my mind. However, by the time I got to the end, I questioned myself a little because Nainai lived for at least another three years. Since she had a positive mentality, she was able to keep a smile on her face and live much longer than anyone expected. Her family believed that if she knew, she would be devastated and it would take a toll on her health. I have been going back and forth about whether Wang and her family did the right thing or not, but I concluded that they should have told Nainai. My argument is that if I were the one diagnosed with a terminal illness, I would want someone to tell me. Like most people, I would obviously be devastated by this news no matter how old I was or how much longer I had to live. But if I only had a few months to live, I would want to do things that I had never gotten the chance to do before and say proper goodbyes to people before I got too sick. I would not want to become extremely ill out of nowhere and with no preparation that I am about to die. It’s possible that not knowing the truth could keep me alive for a little longer, but I would ultimately die suddenly like Wang’s grandfather did when Nainai did not tell him about his liver cancer. In addition, it is clear in the story that the secret was a burden for Wang’s entire family to carry. Even though they felt they were doing the right thing, there was still guilt on their conscious for deceiving Nainai. It was also difficult to hide their emotions from her because they knew this could be the last time that they saw her. They made a huge, complicated plan and if one thing went wrong, the secret would be out. I think Wang’s family went to a lot of trouble to withhold a truth that should have already been told to Nainai when she first went to see the doctor. It is understandable that they did not want to make Nainai upset and that it was part of Chinese culture that good mentality keeps you alive. However, I believe she deserved to know so that she could come to terms with her impending death and say goodbye to her loved ones before it was too late. Just a few months ago, I almost told someone a difficult truth but ended up lying instead to spare her feelings. This person was my roommate from Bloomsburg University and it was the night I told her I was transferring back home. Recently, I came to the revelation that I was not truly happy at Bloomsburg. One reason was that I had a lot of medical issues, particularly with my heart, and the campus was on a giant hill. Everyday walking to class was a struggle and I always had to stop halfway to sit on a bench so that I could catch my breath. The second, and main reason, for wanting to leave was that I was so lonely at Bloomsburg. I loved my roommate and we had become best friends, but every weekend she would go to her boyfriend’s house since he was only an hour away. Being a somewhat shy person, I never really made any other friends and had no one to hang out with. I would FaceTime my boyfriend or parents and cry because I missed them so much and I hated being cooped up in my room all day. It got to the point where my dad drove two and a half hours to come see me and bring me home for the day. In the middle of October, I woke up one Monday morning and realized that I did not want this to be my life for the next four years. I could not get the thought out of my head and called my parents to tell them about my revelation. Over the next week, we came up with a plan that I would come home at the end of the semester and transfer to Delaware County Community College. They said I could transfer the following fall to West Chester University. I became very excited that I was coming back home, but I doubted myself if this was the right thing to do. My hesitation was that I’d be leaving a really great roommate behind. I knew she would be devastated when I told her, especially because of the reason why I was leaving. Just like me, she did not have a lot of friends either and I did not want to leave her with no one to be her roommate. However, I knew I could not let her keep me back from going home and being happy. When I finally decided to tell her, everything came out wrong and did not go how I planned it. One night after we had turned out the lights for bed, I started crying because of how lonely I felt and she asked what was wrong. First, I told her how lonely I actually was on weekends and how homesick I was. I explained that it was not her fault that she left every weekend because I would do the same thing if my boyfriend were that close to the school. Then, I stupidly blurted out that I decided to transfer at the end of the semester. She immediately began apologizing repeatedly and said she would not leave every weekend if it meant I would stay. My roommate thought it was all her fault, and of course it was not, but being so lonely was the main reason I was leaving. I instantly felt guilty and came up with a lie to try to calm her down. Quickly, I blamed my transfer completely on my heart condition and told her that the doctors think it is best if I am on a less hilly campus. The doctors never said this, but I was willing to say anything so she would stop blaming herself. I don’t know if she fully believed me, but it was enough to calm her down. Throughout the rest of the semester, I kept up the lie by emphasizing how hard it was to walk up the hill to make it seem like this was my main reason for leaving. It was somewhat true because it was difficult to walk to class, but I’m not one to openly complain about discomfort. She accepted my decision to leave and was very supportive, saying that my health is more important than school. I hate lying and don’t do it often, but I felt that in this case, I needed to stretch the truth in order to not hurt her feelings or put blame on her. To this day, we still talk almost every day and I’m so glad that we do because if I had given her the difficult truth, she might not have spoken to me ever again. |
Molly ZahnerI will use this blog to post my informal writing assignments for my English Composition I class. Archives
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